Amusing Internet Findings Redux

Off-topic discussions about anything you please!

Moderator: gillian

Postby gillian » Wed Apr 06, 2005 1:37 pm

marybeth wrote:Ladies don't despair. Mail-order husbands are here:

http://www.mailorderhusbands.net/order/


And here I thought I would NEVER find the man of my dreams. Problem solved! Thanks marybeth!
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Postby StevieFan » Wed Apr 06, 2005 2:05 pm

marybeth wrote:Ladies don't despair. Mail-order husbands are here:

http://www.mailorderhusbands.net/order/



Can we only choose ONE??!
*YOUR AD HERE*
Call or email for rates.
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Postby penguin » Fri Apr 22, 2005 9:48 am

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I've got walls, I've got wings, I am ready for the fire
I've got trust in nothing, see, I lost it by and by
but I've got something shining somewhere
honey, I dream on the sly --Chris Pureka
PattyChat | AntjeDuvekot.net | ChrisPureka.net | MattMorrow.net | Trades
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Postby Kim » Sat Apr 23, 2005 10:20 am

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Postby altCountryGuy » Wed May 04, 2005 4:24 am


Everybody needs a little forgiveness.

http://www.last.fm/user/altCountryGuy/
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Postby TontoBronto » Wed May 04, 2005 6:30 am

altCountryGuy wrote:http://limecat.net/

On another forum, there was a real catfight between two guys who each were using that picture as an avatar--it was called "melonhead" over there.

That'd be one big lime to cover a cat's head! (or a PhotoShop lime?)
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Postby solesearching » Wed May 04, 2005 10:36 am

Ninja Courier Service

Found this on a Detroit forum and I thought I'd share.
How lovely and how doomed this connection of everyone with lungs.

Juliana Spahr
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Postby Turk » Fri May 06, 2005 7:18 pm

Just for the heck of it.....

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Postby altCountryGuy » Sun May 08, 2005 10:27 pm


Everybody needs a little forgiveness.

http://www.last.fm/user/altCountryGuy/
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Postby solesearching » Mon May 09, 2005 7:32 pm

I put Disco Fred into a google image search to contribute to the potential avatar thread and found this website.
http://www.discofred.com Beware...it plays a cheesy instrumental version of that Mambo no. 5 song.

Now, I'm pretty sure that this Disco Fred (who also loves dancing) is not our Disco Fred because there are no feather boa's to be found in any of the photos!
How lovely and how doomed this connection of everyone with lungs.

Juliana Spahr
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Postby altCountryGuy » Wed May 11, 2005 2:44 am

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes sing Candy Shop. This is hilarious!!!

http://liquidgeneration.com/poptoons/to ... holmes.asp

Everybody needs a little forgiveness.

http://www.last.fm/user/altCountryGuy/
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Postby Mis » Wed May 11, 2005 9:11 am

This may only be funny to me, as I write tests for a living, but I thought this was hilarious, especially in light of the gay/straight thread here, and the current political climate. In case you didn't know, Texas and Kansas public schools have recently ordered specialized "state-curriculum-specific" health and science textbooks that eradicate any mention of homosexuality existing at all, advocate ONLY abstinence as birth control, and diminish the teaching of the Theory of Evolution to perhaps a sentence, if that.

Just a warning...this is rather Un-PC, but I thought it was hysterical.

Fox Schools Presents
In association with the Kansas and Texas public schools:

The 2015 SATs


PART A: Science
1. A strain of bacteria, after repeated exposure to an
antibiotic, develops a resistance to that antibiotic.
This is an example of:
A. microevolution
B. microintelligentdesign
C. how the liberal media lies
D. why faith healing is better than secular medicine

2. Global temperatures have risen 1 degree F since
2004. This is due to:
A. the greenhouse effect
B. unsound science
C. the Clinton administration
D. gays

3. Scientific theories are:
A. ones which makes predictions one can test against
experimental data
B. only theories
C. used by out-of-the-mainstream liberal eggheads to
oppress white people
D. tricks of Satan



PART B: Mathematics
1. Pi is:
A. the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its
diameter
B. three
C. I refuse to answer this question on the grounds
that my dad makes a lot of money
D. something Greek homosexuals invented to turn you
gay

2. If dinosaurs first appeared 250 million years ago,
and became extinct 185 million years later, how long
ago did they become extinct?
A. 65 million years ago
B. There is no paleontological consensus that
dinosaurs ever existed
C. 3500 years ago, during the Flood
D. However long ago it was that they turned gay and
lost their moral values

3. If you make $50,000 a year, and the flat income tax
rate is 10%, how much money do you pay the IRS each year?
A. $5,000
B. Too much.
C. $0. The federal government has no Constitutional
right to inconvenience me.
D. The IRS is part of the gay mafia.


PART C: History
1. The US lost the Vietnam War because:
A. we miscalculated the determination of the enemy.
B. liberals and the media wouldn't let Rambo do his job.
C. IT WAS A TIE!
D. Clinton made everyone in the Army get gay married.

2. Who led the American army during the Revolutionary War?
A. George Washington
B. George W. Bush
C. Ronald Reagan
D. Jesus

3. Who betrayed the American army during the
Revolutionary War?
A. Benedict Arnold
B. Bill Clinton
C. Hillary Clinton
D. The Jews


PART D: Literature
1. What is the greatest book ever written by an American?
A. The Great Gatsby
B. A Charge to Keep
C. Left Behind 2: Tribulation Force
D. The Bible

2. In Shakespeare's "Julius Caesar", Caesar is betrayed by:
A. Brutus
B. Clinton
C. the liberal media
D. the Jews

3. In 1609, Galileo looked through a telescope and saw
four small bodies orbiting Jupiter. This showed:
A. that not all celestial bodies orbit the Earth, and
that the Earth is not necessarily at the center of the Universe
B. there is no astronomical consensus that anything
orbits Jupiter
C. Galileo was a biased liberal
D. the telescope was gay

THE END

Scoring is at the discretion of your local school board.
Liars
are lying
Airplanes
are flying
Love isn't here
Love isn't here
But it's somewhere...
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Postby Redlucifer » Sun Jun 05, 2005 8:20 pm

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Postby Arlene » Mon Jun 06, 2005 2:09 pm

I kind of enjoyed this site which lets you look up dumb federal and state laws. See http://dumblaws.com/laws.php?site=laws&cid=184

For example, did you know that it is illegal to sing off key in North Carolina?

Also, did you know that a US citizen can take possession of any foreign, uninhabited island, as long as it contains bird droppings?
"You've got to sing like you don't need the money, love like you'll never get hurt. You've got to dance like no one is watching. It's gotta come from the heart, if you want it to work."
~Susannah Clark

"Ginger Rogers did everything that Fred Astaire did. She just did it backwards and in high heels." ~Molly Ivins

"If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner."
~Tallulah Bankhead

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Postby LimeTwister » Mon Jun 06, 2005 6:02 pm

Arlene wrote:For example, did you know that it is illegal to sing off key in North Carolina?


uh oh, I am in deep shit.
I guess I'm taking my chances
Giving up the ring, throwing in the gloves
I guess I'm taking my chances
Trading in my things For a couple wings on a little white dove
And one big love, one big love
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